First and foremost, alhamdulillah the most awaited day has come at last! And I am ready to serve one month notice period effective semalam, 24 December 2013. My firm policy, so bring it on.
When I was typing my resignation letter yesterday, hate to admit but I got teary-eyed. Sobs. I'm a tax consultant by profession doing mainly corporate tax returns and I love my job, seriously. Sometimes ada la meroyan sana sini, but that's what life is all about. Kind of a love-hate relationship. Lucky I'm not leaving because of any drama atau pun because I don't like my job. It's just that Allah has better plans for me than I had for myself :). Take a break for one year and finish what you have started :). I am still very nostalgic. EY... my first and only job, my first and only interview. Bittersweet :'). Hmmm, change is always hard.
And alhamdulillah I am now a Chartered Accountant :'). My application has just been approved in the recent council meeting of Malaysian Institute of Accountants (MIA). This is one of the things that you really have to do before leaving the firm! Haha. Kalau tak memang jenuh nak apply lepas ni. I should have applied the membership earlier, at least last year. Takde la kelam kabut macam ni. Haih. But anyway, semua benda pun macam dah almost settle :). Just pending sikit-sikit lagi, my visa application. Ada 3 visa nak kena buat altogether and I'm planning to apply for US visa jugak, tapi macam tak dan je nak buat. Sobs. Too little time. Gedik je ni, nak pergi entah bila. Tapi orang kata sediakan payung sebelum hujan gitu konsepnya. Hahaha. At least that visa valid for 10 years, multiple entries kan. Manalah tahu gedik nak pergi from UK ke. #eh?? Haha.
So... that's about it. A brief summary of everything. I'm leaving real soon! Mixed feelings. Suka, takut, sedih, excited, semualah. :'). Semoga Allah permudahkan segalanya.
Hmm... year end is approaching, holiday mode is on. And that Mr. Arrogant pun tak terkecuali. He is currently in London. Mungkin busy berkuntum dekat Oxford Street sekarang ni, boxing day kan ataupun baru bangun tido nak cari makan, lapar katanya. Hehe. Sobs. My life is pretty weird enough nowadays.
And yes we met again just two of us :'). Not a date, no. It was just an extended ice breaking session. He is the strangest crush I have EVER had in my life, the weirdest, and I know he knows I like him that's for sure. Too obvious kot. Hmmm. We met few times dah sebenarnya, kata satu office kan. Sometimes I ran away, sometimes just borak dengan kawan-kawan dia and pretend he's not there. Hahaha. No eye contact, NEVER! Dah jangan nak cakap drama ke apa, tapi memang tak boleh berdepan dengan dia secara normal. Postur badan jadi kaku, oksigen makin kurang, muka jadi panas, rasa nak pengsan. Hahaha. Biarlah orang tu nak confused ke apa, I just don't have enough courage to face this! Hehe.
So, can you imagine? WE NEVER REALLY KNEW EACH OTHER. Sangat awkward kot sebab dia pun pernah tanya directly kat FB ok kenapa you lari you? Haih. And few people yang tahu pasal drama lari-lari ni gatal tangan pergi like?? Choii. And last Monday few hours before flight dia to London we met over lunch. :'). I NEVER thought this would happen, seriously. Sebab the day before tu dia macam diam je. He kept me waiting kot. Haih. Memang we had a deal Thursday haritu tapi at least bagitahu la kan Ahad tu jadi ke tidak. Walaupun dia takde la cancel ke apa and we promised each other dah pun. Cumanya what if kalau dia lupa? Aku ni punyalah tak boleh duduk diam since Thursday. Duk fikir macam-macam. So I cried. Sebab soo sad. Hmm I guess I'm just a little too sensitive. Tapi my friend bagi tahu, don't push. He's a smart guy he knows his schedule so he knows dia dah janji with you, Inshaa Allah the lunch is on dear just tunggu! Hehe tapi knowing me, one drama after another.
Jadinya Monday haritu, I just wore kurung modern biasa pink colour macam selalu pakai pergi office. Mata and muka bengkak and sembab sikit sebab nangis kan. Hahahaha. Dramanya kau ni Fida oi. Ni baru nak kenal ni kau dah buat drama macam-macam. Haih. My bad, I know! Then around 9.30 am macamtu dia whatsapp "dalam pukul 12 lunch?" OMG! It took me 30 minutes to reply kot. Sebab dengan condition muka dan mata yang tak mengizinkan, duk fikir macam tak nak jumpa je. Dah la first time ni. And I said next time maybe sebab taknak dia rushing, flight dia malam kan. Tapi dia cakap ok je, flight 12 midnight. Hehe. So I went to Watson bawah office, pergi beli Revlon eye concealer uolss!!!! Hahahahahahaha. Punyalah nak tutup mata bengkak. Hehe. Lupa nak bawak concealer kat rumah, sebabnya how do I know?? Pergi office just bawak basic make up palette sudah, perlu ke nak angkut semua kan. Tak pasal-pasal je. Huhuhu. I was not ready to see him please. Semua pun serba tak kena.
So he came and he picked me up :'). I don't like surprises, really. Ingatkan dia datang office and nak makan area office je. And dia sengih cakap takde nice place kat sini. Ok first thing I noticed, he dressed properly! Sobs. Sedangkan iols? Sedih. His friend bagitahu jangan nak overdress sangat sebab he might wear his usual t-shirt, khakis short and slipper je pun. Hehe. Tapi no no no! He wore polo collar shirt kaler navy blue, jeans and dark brown loafers :'). Sekali tengok je masa dalam kereta dia and terus lekat dalam kepala otak kekdahnya. Haha terus tersenyum sorang-sorang tanpa sedar gitu sebab selalu tengok dia kat FB memang dia tak pakai macam ni and masa jumpa dia time Sapura Carnival that day pun dia tak macam ni. Totally different. Hehe. Oh God, the first impression that Mr. Arrogant gave is incredibly amazing. How nih,?? I'm going to hurt myself soon. And heartbroken. Tapi kalau orang yang kenal this guy mesti pelik kenapa la duk suka dia sangat-sangat. No reason please I just like him the way he is. :'). He is strong-willed, passionate, ambitious, gentle, kind, firm and the list goes on that made me feel so much attracted to him. As much as within my limited knowledge before, I like him. Then now I see him and I like him even more. Hmmm. Sedih kan. I thought kalau dah jumpa tu maybe ada la benda yang boleh buat perasaan tu hilang. But no I was wrong.
He brought me to the Italian restaurant lupa dah apa namanya. Tengok menu pon tak paham apa benda. I was totally clueless. Makanan apa nih. Hahaha. So I asked him apa yang sedap. Hehe. He is so gentleman la pulak haihhhh. Duk cerita ni pun tersengih sorang-sorang. Hehe. Scene bukak pintu kereta ataupun tarik kerusi tu semua bukan reality ok, kalau nak scene tu pi tengok cite Korea! Hahahaha. He is gentle in his own way :'). Baik, soft-spoken, witty. Pelik sangat dia tak pernah ada any relationship before with any girls. Too busy maybe and he is too workaholic or maybe he's not ready for any commitment. Kalau orang tak kenal dia maybe akan fikir he's married and dah mid 30's. Dia memang nampak mature tapi the fact is, he is just a year older than me :).
So we ordered the food, and we talked, and talked and talked. 2 hours and half kot? 12.00 - 2.30 hehe. Kesian dia sebab he told me dia tak packing lagi, tak tukar duit lagi and tak withdraw duit pun lagi. Hahaha. Last minute jugak dia ni pun. He loves travelling a lot. Tu yang tak kisah pun pergi sorang. Haih dia ni suka senyum and benda ni macam menyakitkan hati. Sobs. Both of us takde tengok handphone pun dalam duration 2 jam setengah tu and I like it that way. Hahaha. Kalau salah sorang tengok dah sah-sah la boring kan. Hiks.
Ok confession time, iols cuma makan 2 suap je. Hahahahahaha. Tak lalu uols. Dia sampai tanya tak sedap ke. Hehehehe. I said no tapi tak lapar. Haih. Bengong je. And dah after sejam setengah borak tu the waiter ada tanya do you want any desert sir? And he asked me nak coffee tak. I said no its ok. Sebabnya kan, apple juice ni pon tak habis lagi. Sekali dia order 2 coffee pulak dah! Time tu dah 1.30. Lunch hour dah habis diknon! Dia takpelah tengah cuti kan.
And my coffee pun tak habis, punya lah nervous. Padahal kan, I'm a coffee lover. Then he asked for the bill and dia bayar. So bila nak masuk kereta tu dia macam ckp sorry Fida, panas sikit. Memang panas la sebab dia park dekat open site, tengah hari lagipun, tapi perlu ke cakap sorry?? Commonly known ok and not his fault pun. Lumrah alam katanya kalau dah tengah hari buta memang panas la. Hahaha. And I was just looking at him je lah cakap it's ok tengah hari kot and dia duk betul-betulkan aircond. Hahaha. Lepastu dia cakap, takut cair make up you. Bahahahahhahahahahahahaha. Sekarang aku memang rasa nak tergelak. Dalam kereta tu rasa macam eeeeeee bencinya. Make up ala kadar je pon macam biasa pergi office. Ceh!
So dalam kereta dia cakap lagi, next time jangan lari-lari dah. I tak makan orang kan? Kekeke. Motif?? And I just replied, tak tahu la kenapa lari from you and senyum je la kan, nak buat apa lagi. Then he replied, maybe kita tak kenal kot, sebab tu you lari. Hehe. Anyway masa before dia drop kan kat depan lobby office, I told him sini la the first time I nampak you dengan your boss nak pergi makan. Hehe. That was few months ago. And before keluar from his car, I gave him one book the best attractions in the UK. Buku ni dah letak kat office since last Friday! Hahaha. So I told him, ni my book tau, you pinjam je sebab nanti you travel alone kat UK. Nanti pulangkan balik. Dia macam gelak besar and cakap haaa pinjam je?? Hahaha. Its not yours, its mine ok. And then terusla iols keluar macamtu je terlupa nak cakap thank you please for everything!!! OMG. So classic. Sobs.
That book is quite thick and besar macam text book sejarah ok. I bought masa Big Bad Wolf tu untuk kegunaan masa hadapan. Hehe. Ingatkan dia taknak bawak sebab memang tebal, leceh je tapi before dia fly tu dia cakap dia bawak that book, and he said thank you. Hehe. Tak tau la tipu ke apa but thank you :). I did ask how much should I pay, it is a common courtesy anyway. Tapi dia cakap ala tak payahla. Hmmm. Thank you so much for everything. Stay safe wherever you are and happy holiday :).
Wow panjangnya! Tak sangka. Hahaha. Thank you for reading. I might delete this post later I don't know. He's that interesting, although it was brief and didn't turn out the way I hope, it's undeniable to say that he's so special to be able, effortlessly made me feel the way I feel now. I will remember this guy as someone very special whom Allah brought briefly in my life although he was never mine. :') Oh God, I've said way too much.
One more month and we will never see each other again.
But life is a journey, so just wait and see.